RAVENOUS

RAVENOUS was released in 1999 to almost no fanfare and pretty much disappeared from movie screens as soon as it had appeared.  It boasted a solid B-list cast including Guy Pearce and Robert Carlyle, but for some reason was essentially ignored by horror fans.  Then it came on cable and DVD, and soon the cult surrounding RAVENOUS started to build.  Eventually I got sucked in myself - and I must admit, I've seen the movie now more than a few times.  There's something just irresistable about its corky take on cannibalism  in the 1840s (yes, I just wrote that).

CREATURE UNKNOWN

There’s something sort of charming about a movie that is so completely derivative and unoriginal. There are no illusions on the part of the filmmakers that they are making CITIZEN KANE.  Everyone involved gets together and says, “This is going to be one crappy horror movie – let’s do it!”  CREATURE UNKNOWN is one such film. It’s about 2 parts FRIDAY THE 13^th and 1 part CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON.  The result is a pretty entertaining shlock-fest with enough gore and laughter to keep me smiling for 80 minutes.

STRANGELAND (a.k.a DEE SNIDER'S STRANGELAND)

Dee Snider is one sick freak.  STRANGELAND is the 1998 film he wrote to much hullabaloo – the guy from Twisted Sister writing and starring in a horror movie.  The result is a genuinely twisted (had to use it, sorry) piece of sado-masochistic sickness. And for that reason, I almost have to recommend it. It’s so truly nasty that it earns props for not holding back. Sadly, what prevents a recommendation is the fact that Snider’s script and the overall execution of the movie are sub par. The nasty make-up and effects can only get you so many points, but ultimately it takes a little something more to make a fun horror flick.

ANACONDA

ANACONDA, a relic of late 90s shocker flix, bills itself as a horror movie, but in reality has more in common with the monster movie tradition.  Go back many years to the great monster flicks of the 50s, CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON, THEM!, etc. etc. This movie takes a page directly out of their book, and throws in some JAWS for good measure. Overall, an incredibly cheesy film, but so entertaining you forgive all its faults (almost).

CREEPSHOW

Considered a classic by some, CREEPSHOW is Stephen King's homage to old E.C. horror comic-books. Directed by horror master George Romero, a script by Mr. King himself, and an all-star cast contribute to what is widely regarded as a horror milestone.  Expecting a masterpiece, I was disappointed a bit. But in terms of checking my brain at the door and just trying to enjoy a silly horror movie, I was fully satisfied.

THREE aka SURVIVAL ISLAND

THREE, frequently known as SURVIVAL ISLAND, is the kind of movie that made me giddy as a teenager.  Essentially nothing more than an excuse for one unbelievably bodacious woman to prance around in a bikini for an hour and a half, this movie will keep your eyes glued to the set for all the wrong reasons.  The plot is half-baked, the acting is atrocious (ah, the incomparable Billy Zane), and there is next to no suspense or horror involved.  What there is, however, is Kelly Brook in a bikini – and sometimes less than that – for almost the entire screen time.  If that doesn’t send you rushing out to check your Showtime Beyond listings, nothing will.